How to Manage Difficult Business Conversations

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Some things just can’t be avoided. Taxes. School fundraisers. Cellulite. And if you’re in business, conflict.

Whether it’s your VA who is continually missing deadlines or a new partner who failed to pay your commissions, as a small business owner, you’ll have to deal with conflict sooner or later. Learning how to handle difficult conversations is a critical skill that will serve you well.

The trouble is, handling conflicts with grace doesn’t come naturally. We’re human. We react – sometimes badly – when we should be proactive instead. We take things personally when they’re not. We sometimes lash out first and apologize later.

With a little planning and consideration, though, you’ll have a much better outcome, regardless of the nature of the conflict.

Set the stage – Nothing stresses us out quite like the words, “We need to talk.” You just know something bad is going to follow those words, and in most cases, you’re right. Rather than starting a difficult conversation off with words that instantly put people on the defensive, begin on a positive note:

• “Can you help me figure out what happened with _________?”
• “Do you have a few minutes? I want to run some ideas by you.”
• “I think we have different ideas about ________. Can you help me clarify some deadlines?”

All of these conversation starters invite openness and idea sharing. Rather than being stressed and closed down, the other person will be more open to a productive conversation.

Offer a solution (or two) – Whatever the trouble, be sure you have at least one potential solution in mind before you initiate the conversation. Remember, this talk may come as a surprise to the other person. Your VA may not realize that missing deadlines is causing a problem for you. Your new partner might not have realized he or she missed the payment.

By providing at least one potential solution, you’ll avoid the awkward back-and-forth, go-nowhere conversation that ends in frustration. (“I don’t know, what do you think we should do?”)
Do you find yourself struggling with difficult conversations?

Do you find yourself struggling with difficult conversations? How will you apply this advice to your next conversation? Tell me about it!